Tag Archives: middle age

The Journey – September 2014 Update

11 Sep

Hey hey – It’s been awhile. Thinking about a few things lately and felt the need to journal a bit.

As of the 4th of July week, I was down to 283lbs. Still as big as a whale, but a far cry from the 334lbs. I started at. 51lbs. if truth be told.

Well vacation week was fantastic and I denied myself nothing. I ate, drank, and was merry all the week long with the best of intentions to get back on track the day I got home. That day came….and subsequently went.

Since then, I’m been off and on with working out and eating right. I always seem to start the week out right w/pretty good eating habits and a Monday workout….usually. But then something comes up, or I’m too tired, or going out to dinner sounds good, or friends want to meet for drinks and it’s been too easy for the bad habits to creep back in. I haven’t been getting all the workouts in. 1 or 2 a week isn’t cutting it. Sometimes I haven’t made it at all. Free day Sunday, where I allow my self every guilt-free indulgence, has pretty much turned into Free Weekend. And sometimes, due to summer and vacation days, has turned into free 3.5-day weekends, etc.

What I’m getting at is I’ve ballooned back up to 299lbs. since I fell out of good habits. Well, anywyas, today is 9/11 (ugh, I know….terrible memories), and this week I got myself recommitted to a healthier lifestyle again. I’m glad I didn’t fall too far from grace, but if I don’t recommit, I know I’ll be right back where I started beginning of February. How depressing that thought seems. So F*ck It. I ain’t doin’ that.

What I noticed really the most, wasn’t the waistline growing again. That really hasn’t been that big of a deal. It’s the lack of energy. That energy level was just skyrocketing and I’ve been back to feeling like my old lethargic self.

I am pleased to report that this week I’ve ate right all week. I’ve been to the gym everyday. Monday wasn’t pleasant. Tuesday wasn’t much better. Today. I feel great! And ready to go. It really doesn’t take that much to get back on the wagon if you haven’t let yourself fall too far. The nice thing about being fat, is it falls off fast, especially when you’re just beginning and losing all that water. This is like beginning again and I’m already back down to 293lbs. It’s all water, I know, but before, just eating reasonably healthy, watching portions, and a modest 30-min a day at the gym, it was simple to lose 1-2lbs. every single week. It doesn’t seem like much, it doesn’t readily show, but that’s 50-100lbs. in a year! And that’s my kind of program and loss level.

Anyways, I’m back. New goal is to be under 283lbs. (my lowest weight I can remember in at least a decade and probably more) by my cruise in mid October. I’m even optomistic I can post a bathing suit photo. It still won’t be pretty, but it will be pretty good progress.

Peace & love to you all,
xoxoxo

The Journey – Week 8 Musings

29 Mar

Monday, 3/25 – Really nice to fly today and not have the seat belt digging into me.  I’ve maxed that thing out.  Thank Gawd, I’ve never needed “the extension”, but it’s always pretty tight.  Too tight.  Not today.  Nice and easy, and the young business babe next to me didn’t even seem to mind being seated next to a small whale.  Normally, I can see that look 20-25 feet before I get to my row.  That “Please God.  Don’t let him sit by me.  Please God.” look.  It’s humiliating.  Nice, cozy flight today.

Friday, 3/28 – What a week!  70+ hours.  Sleep/work/sleep/work.   But I did it.  I had the energy to push through.  Monday & Tuesday were brutal, but the week got better after that.  On the road in Boise, ID.  Unfortunately, there was only one time I could’ve worked out and I elected to go drinking with colleagues instead.  It was fun and the right choice.  I WILL be back in the gym tommorrow morning though!  I don’t think I can make it tonight after I worked all day and fly home tonight.  Fortunately, I did eat healthy almost the whole trip.  That’s always a struggle but I did it and it wasn’t even very hard.  I did break down last night, but other than that, perfect.  So I’m hoping the scale is kind in the morning on weigh-in day!  It should be!  Feeling good and looking forward to going home and seeing my family.

Saturday, 3/29 – Damn!  The week caught up with me.  I was exhausted by the time I got home.  Hugged everybody and dropped like a rock.  However, there’s nothing like a 10-hour sleep in your own bed.  Woke up refreshed at 6am.  Caught up on a couple shows, hit the gym and started running errands.  The scale wasn’t as kind as I’d hoped it would be, but I can’t complain.  It’s been 8 weeks and I’ve dropped 32lbs.  ALMOST under 300.  Getting close.  Capped off with a nice 90-minute massage.  So good to get back to the gym.  Plenty of energy and feeling great today.  Looking forward to my buddy Michael’s birthday bash tonight and Nerd Heaven a.k.a. Emerald City Comicon tomorrow with the kids!

See ya next week!

 

Still my all time favorite Comicon Cosplayer.  NO!  It's not me!

Still my all time favorite Comicon Cosplayer. NO! It’s not me!

The Journey – Week 6 Musings

15 Mar

Last Saturday rolled around and I sat down to do my weekly reflection.  I recall during Week 5 having all sorts of wise, or at least what I think is interesting, comments and thoughts that I could hopefully share and hit one person and inspire them to think about changing.  But, when I sat down, to reflect, nothing came to me.  Everything was fine.  Had a very good, busy, productive week and stayed on track.  What happened to all that great stuff I was thinking about saying during the week?  Don’t know….I lost it.  (And it probably wasn’t that great to begin with, but it seemed like it at the time.)

So with that thought, I figured I’d change it up this week and go with short, random musings as they come to me during the week.

Monday, 3/10 – Yesterday on free day, I overdid it.  Not on purpose.  It was just “free day” and I don’t worry on free day.  I do what I want.  Went out to breakfast.  Had a 3 egg omelette w/ham, bacon, and sausage, home fries, and a piece of thick wheat toast.  It was huge.  It was pretty damn good.  It was WAY too much to eat.  I was stuffed.  Later in the day, I had 4 tagalong cookies, not because I was hungry, but because they were there and tasted awesome.  Probably drank 3-4 glasses of my favorite drink, Coke throughout the day.  For dinner, I wasn’t hungry at all, but it was free day!  Don’t waste it!  I went to 5 Guys.  Got a bacon double cheeseburger and a large fry.  Stuffed them into me, then subsequently felt like shit.  It all did not fit in me anymore and I forced it.  That was not good.  And kind of ruined it.  The eating pleasure, completely gone.  It was simply about finishing and getting it in on free day.  Problem:  None.  It was free day!  Lesson learned:  I could’ve EASILY taken that delicious breakfast and spread it out through the day and been JUST fine.  Box it up when I leave, or throw it away, just leave it.  Those are options, I don’t consider when I eat out.  Or, if I want to indulge and am not even hungry, I could’ve EASILY gotten by with a bacon cheeseburger and small fry and been JUST fine.   Just because I can, does not mean I should or have to.  I’m going to fix that next Sunday.  You should not eat until it makes you feel sick.  What I used to consider normal, is no longer normal for me.

Monday 3/10 – I am wearing a pair of jeans that I could not button, let alone zip 5 weeks and 2 days ago.  They fit wonderfully and are VERY comfortable.  That is a win today.

This is a picture of myself I absolutely HATE.  I look, I mean, I am massive and look very unhappy.  Even though I wasn't.  This was on 12/29 and a contributer to me deciding I needed to make a change.  it was also the final regular season win for the Seahawks against the Rams which won us the NFC West.

This is a picture of myself I absolutely HATE. I look, I mean, I am massive and look very unhappy. Even though I wasn’t. This was on 12/29 and a contributor to me deciding I needed to make a change. it was also the final regular season win for the Seahawks against the Rams which won us the NFC West.

Monday 3/10 – Some asshole parked so close to me I couldn’t even fit between the cars to unlock the door.  I have NO clue how this person got out of their car as our driver doors were no more than 3 inches apart.  A sheet of notebook paper would have trouble getting out of this car.  Must’ve been the skinniest prick in the world.  Anyways, the reason I bring this up, is I remember this happened to me about a year ago.  Same car.  I drive an older 4 door sedan.  It’s a 1998 POS Malibu with 116K miles on it.  It runs like a top.  It is not big.  Anyways, I have to go in the passenger door and climb over the console to be able to drive away.  Again, the car is not big.  For the record, I am.  Now when I did this a year ago, I remember being thankful no one witnessed it.  I remember huffing and puffing as I tried to contort my massive body to clear the console and drop into the drivers seat.  It was a bitch and I think I had to make a couple attempts before I succeeded.  Today, recalling that dreadful occurrence, I was shocked as it took me about 2.5 seconds to quickly and nimbly hop the console, plop right down in the drivers seat and drive off.  After I wrote the asshole parker a nice like FU note.  That’s progress baby!

Tuesday 3/11 – I am in awe of myself and how productive I have been lately.  This new vigor and renewed energy is wonderful.  I have always been a procrastinater and the last 3-4 months before I started The Journey, I was severely lacking focus.  I was really “laying on the bottom.”  I felt like I was starting to die.  Not painful, or hurting, or dying tomorrow, but I honestly did not feel like I was growing or living any more.  I was just repeating the motions day in and day out somewhat aimlessly and I just did not feel like me.  I am so much more dialed in.  I don’t know if it’s the healthy eating, proper sleep, or what, but it’s something and I really love it.  Rather than think, and him-and-haw, I just keep doing it and getting it done.  Whatever “it” may be.

Thursday 3/13 – I don’t think I made a poop yesterday.  That’s never happened before.  I’m usually in the can at least 30 minutes (total) a day.  That’s like 2% of the day.  That’s like 3.5 hours a week pooping.  This is going to save me a lot of time!

Thursday 3/13 – Knowing I have a work dinner tonight, I got up and went to the gym this morning! That was smart. Healthy food packed for the day. Now tonight I have to make a sensible meal choice and cap the cocktails at two! One day at a time…

Saturday 3/14 – Had a long 13 hour day yesterday and as I type this at 7am, I have another long one coming up today, but then this project will be DONE!!  Got home from work last night about 8:40pm and my wife’s car was gone.  Then I remembered the school had the silent auction and bingo night.  I was on this committe and spent dozens of hours planning it and working on it, but unfortunately couldn’t make the event due to work.  Now normally, I’d park, and go right up to bed, but I whipped the car around and drove back to the school as the event had 20 minutes left.  I did make it and got my appearance in, even though I have to get up early again on Saturday and go back to work.  Extra energy rocks.  I really am not that tired even after finishing two long, hard days and one more coming up today.  Just about to head out.

I am a little dissapointed I did not have time to get to the gym yesterday or today, but life goes on.  I will do better tomorrow and I was able to stay on track eating all week.  I know I must’ve dropped a couple more pounds.  2-3 pounds a week is 100-150 a year!  And my starting goal was 115, and I’m about 30 in after finishing week six.

See ya next week or sooner if something cool happens.

The Journey – Week 5

9 Mar

This was the easiest week yet.  As far as staying on target.  Had no problems eating right or getting to the gym.  And it was a tough week.  I have a couple huge projects at work brewing and it was a high stress, couldn’t get enough done, kind of a week.  To add to that, I’m my daughter’s Girl Scout Cookie Mom.  That’s a huge job in itself during this time of year being the cookie warehouse and site sale manager for the entire troop.  It was a trying week.  And you know what?  I did it all and then some.  That ever growing to-do list which I find myself constantly shifting things around and never actually getting anything done…..I actually knocked off a bunch of those as well.

I have so much more energy.  I am not constantly laying down and “resting”.  I’ve been rocking at work too.  So focused and driving everything forward.  It’s been a wonderful feeling to feel like I’m coming back.  This is the person I used to be and the guy I miss.  The bad news is I have about 10 hours of my favorite TV shows DVR’d that I have to catch up on, but I will probably just wind up deleting it all and being done with it.  Who cares?  I really don’t.  That problem solved!

Really nothing more to report than that.  Enjoying my Sunday and feeling super good.  Going out for late breakfast w/the family after we drop off for our first site sale of the day.  Got a few to-dos to wrap and a couple honey-do’s, but the day will be enjoyably spent getting things done, not napping and couching, which is what I would normally be doing on any given Sunday.

Thanks all for your encouragement.  This train is rollin’ on.  See you next week.

P.S.  I am ALMOST under 300 and just a couple points from not being “extremely obese” and am still looking forward to just being plain ole “obese”.